Combative journalist Kelvin Mackenzie has become the latest recruit to the Telegraph’s stable of columnists after penning the first of a new series of weekly columns for the paper.
In it MacKenzie turns his distinctive perspective on life to stick the boot into the NUT, TOWIE and… Masterchef.
First to be subjected to MacKenzie’s ire was the NUT for having the audacity to refer to teaching as a profession, MacKenzie wrote: “Anybody following the resolutions and debate at the union’s conference in Liverpool would realise the teachers had more in common with the dockers of the Sixties or the miners of the Eighties than professionals.”
MacKenzie then turned his attention to litigious PC Kelly Jones who is suing a petrol station owner after tripping on a kerb there whilst responding to a call for help. MacKenzie observed: “Having seen the size of PC Kelly Jones I am surprised the petrol station owner is not suing her for damaging the kerb of his garage in Thetford, Norfolk.”
And finally the unfortunate judges of TV’s Masterchef, John Torode and Greg Wallace, came in for some stick after MacKenzie claimed they were ‘harming, not enhancing ratings, for the BBC’.
The TV cookery aficionado opined: “They look increasingly like the gangsters out of the Hale and Pace comedy series in the Eighties. They bring an air of menace to the meringue and I think the show would be improved by dumping one of them and bringing in a woman.”